PEMDAS

Please Excuse My Drought Afflicted Snippets

Forgive me for my lack of posts over the last few weeks. I am sure you are just dying to know my thoughts, ideas, opinions, life lessons, updates on life, etc. I mean how could you possibly go on with your life?

Yes, the GMAT took place. No, the GMAT did not win! OK, well maybe, but it depends on the perspective you choose to take while assessing the situation. I am certain the GMAT is a complete piece of crap when it comes to MBA program acceptance and no matter how much you study or spend time memorizing ridiculous formulas and fraction/decimal conversions, it doesn't pay off. But, no need to fret, I made a decent score (570) in many programs' eyes. Since I have had some time to regroup, I am now heading places (places who actually care about other more important strengths I have as an applicant and who want me to choose them).

I could now begin my rant about a particular university's MBA program, but I will refrain because I refuse to waste any more of my precious time on such a pathetic program. Take my $50 application fee and shove it where the sun doesn't shine (unless you happen to frequent European beaches)! I should hear back any time now about my acceptance into another SEC MBA program. Go ahead, call me a sell out, but hey, it's only for a year and I'll always be a Tiger at heart (just struggling for the time being).

In other news, the Easter bunny decided to make searching for my basket quite the task this year! I had to get help from my little (almost taller) brother. Good to know the Easter bunny still remembers me and loves me enough to fill my life with uber amounts of dark chocolate and sour candy.

Now that I can break out my white shorts and linen pants (when I buy some), I would appreciate it if the wanna-be fashionistas would box up the UGGly boots and keep them put away until after Labor Day (thanks for your cooperation in advance)! I find it disturbing to witness such a fashion crime, especially in the South, when it is 80 degrees outside. Get. With. The. Program. Or. Become. A. Recluse.

Word: Do NOT attempt the Insanity workout! I took one for the team (yes, you may bend over backwards to thank me) and risked my life. You will lose all of your limbs and mobility for at least a week. You will come close to death after a mere 5 minutes, and you will utter hateful words to the man on TV with the little bit of breath you have. After 45 min. you will realize that walking on the treadmill or putting your shoes on the pavement for a short time will suffice (unless you are a macho man).

Oh and Peter Brown, yes, I am still very bitter and am well aware that it has now been over a year since I won the One Shining Moment contest. You will find my formal letter of rage in your mailbox by the end of the week. Brace yourself.

T-13 Hours and Counting

The day has finally arrived (or will arrive in less than 13 hours). My nerves seem to enjoy breaking the rules and refuse to chill! I have spent the day attempting to "go by the book" and relax, but I am still debating whether or not I have relaxed or I need to relax or I need to study or I need to...AHHHH! Pure craziness, but thankfully for only a little longer.

I attempted to relieve some stress with retail therapy; however, I am still uncertain as to whether or not it contributed to my stress or if it really benefitted me. The first store I entered, the sales associate greeted me and proceeded to look at me and utter the following, "Are you sure I can't help you with anything? You look confused or something." Who is that chick?! I mean really, I know I was stressed out, but give me a break (Nerves: 1 Hilary:0)! Thanks, high school chick. Not only did I not find an Easter top, but I was also paranoid in every store I entered. I just so happened to catch other sales associates looking at me funny because I appeared to have "I'm confused/frightened/lost" written across my face. Epic retail therapy fail!

After such an unsuccessful morning, I needed a pick-me-up. I managed to score the most amazing, delightful, cute (seriously, the bag is adorned w/cream colored polka dots) spring-filled, delicious bag of M&M'S EVER! Let me introduce you to my (your) new chocolate obsession: Coconut M&M'S! The only thing that could possibly make this tasty treat better is dark chocolate; but, the milk chocolate will suffice for now (Nerves 1: Hilary 1). Get. Your. Bag. Now.

Just as I decided that I should become a recluse for remainder of the day, my nerves decided to play an evil trick. Yes, I forgot the code to enter the gate at my apartment (Nerves: 2 Hilary:1)! But no worries, I managed to get home and collect myself (aka come to terms with my mind and put a leash on it).

I refuse to lose to my nerves today; therefore, I will spend the rest of the evening consuming unusually large amounts of dark chocolate and catching plenty of beauty sleep in fresh, crisp, clean sheets (Nerves:2 Hilary:2)!

GMAT OWNAGE: T-13 hours!

*Note(s) to self: Relax. Breathe. Focus. Keep the faith. Exude confidence.

One Shining Moment

March Madness has arrived. I will spend approximately 15 minutes max filling out my 2010 bracket. Be afraid fellow bracketology maniacs! I plan to defeat all competitors in each of my three bracket challenges (don't worry, I play by the rules and use the same bracket in every group).

Usually I pay more attention to college basketball, but for some reason it just didn't interest me much this year. Perhaps I can blame Sporting News Radio's Peter Brown. On Good Friday last year, Sporting News Radio decided to have a "One Shining Moment" lyrics contest. They would play a line or two of the song, and wherever they stopped the music, the listener had to complete the lyric. After my dad and I pondered for a moment about how ignorant the station was for having such a lame contest (I mean hello it's the 21st century, and any contestant could easily Google the song lyrics and read them aloud as necessary), yours truly made the call and won! Yes, as Peter Brown put it, "to all you guys out there, this GIRL just won!"

Well word Peter, that GIRL is losing respect for all things Sporting News, thanks to you not coming through with the prize! After countless e-mails over a year's time, I STILL have yet to receive my prize and have no longer been getting e-mail responses. Bitter much? YES! It is only a specially designed purple and gold, tiger-striped, glass serving bowl with a fleur de lis in the bottom (for free), but it is the principle of the matter. If you say you are going to do something, especially on national radio, then you better follow through. After all, it's your fault for putting such a lame contest on air and presenting me with a perfect opportunity to out-smart you. Too bad Papa Joe had to flee Sporting News years ago. I should have seen the red flag then.

Peter Brown and Sporting News: you are dead to me!

GMAT ownage countdown: 14 days
(I will attempt to make data sufficiency into an object over the next week so that I can physically torture it and destroy it!)

Monday Morning NBC Mishap

Dear NBC33 Baton Rouge,

Please fix your airing issues ASAP! Thanks to you, I had to start off a new week without the TODAY show and had to watch (and be tortured by) Good Morning America instead. Needless to say, the one-time, temporary switch did not suffice! I need my daily fix of Meredith, Matt, Ann and Al like I need my morning coffee. Next time (not that there should ever be a next time) I will forget the morning news and relive the good ol' days with Saved by the Bell reruns.

Thanks for understanding. I look forward to having my morning routine back in order tomorrow.

Your loyal morning viewer,
Hilary

Pre-Spring Bliss

I (my tastebuds/stomach) love this time of year for three reasons:

Samoas (thank-you Girl Scouts), Abita Strawberry Harvest and crawfish, need I say more?

Bachelor Saga

Jake chose Vienna...YUCK! Apparently he was looking for an immature, classless, unattractive bimbo to be his wife. I guess he got what he wanted (clearly not the one his family would have liked him to choose)!

Good news: Ali will be the next bachelorette. Too bad she chose work over Jake! But hey, she was right all along. He wasn't the one for her if he was attracted to Vienna (strictly physical attraction, which is even more puzzling).

More good news from lastnight: Dancing with the Stars will feature Erin Andrews, Chad Ochocinco, Kate Gosselin, Pamela Anderson, Jake (barf) and other celebrities whose names I cannot recall. I've never been a big fan of the show, but I'll definitely have to stay tuned this season.

Maybe these stars can teach me a thing or two about dancing. Knock out two birds with one stone (indulge myself in a primetime television series and learn how to dance with rhythm)!

Let the Countdown Begin!

I officially set my GMAT date for March 30!

There is no turning back now. Motivation has been hard to come by in the last few months, but this $250 sunk cost should do the trick.

Goodbye life, free time and TV (with the exception of the Bachelor season finale). I will now begin my loyal, month-long(ish) date with McGraw-Hill. We have had an interesting, rocky journey during the last year or so, but now it's serious.

A 600 is a must-have score, but why shoot for the minimum? I've decided to shoot for the stars and aim for a 630. Cross your fingers and say some much needed prayers (thanks in advance)!

Note to self: Exude confidence!
Note to GMAT: I WILL OWN YOU in 34 days!

Fiber Fad

When I was in the grocery store last week looking for a box of cereal, I noticed a significant number of boxes advertising "Fiber." Cereal, oatmeal, granola bars, fruit snacks, Little Debbie cakes...OK so maybe not the last two items, but fiber seems to be the "thing" to have in your product these days. I decided to see what this fad was all about a few months ago, and needless to say, for my tastebuds' sake, I will never buy "fiber-ful" products again.

Not only is it the "thing" to eat, but apparently it's also the "thing" to mention in conversation. I don't know about you, but I am not a huge fan of discussing bowel movements/gaseous releases (aka fiber) with my peers. In the last 24 hours, I have listened to two different people rant and rave about fiber.

Did America decide that by adding more laxatives (aka fiber) to consumers' everyday food choices Americans would slowly become less obese (due to increased numbers of bowel movements)?

Why the fiber fad?

Please fade fiber fad, for my senses' sake!